BALLOONS

before i begin...

...a teaching pastor from grand rapids, MI wrote a book called Sex.God. if you are up for a few new thoughts, you should read it. i did about 4-5 mos. ago and enjoyed it. the last entry is a story about letting go...about how messy life and love can be...and about moving forward.

which brings me to BALLOONS.

a couple, at their wedding, takes a bunch of balloons , that represent their past relationships that have failed and other heart wrenching past experiences and sets them free - as a symbol of their moving forward, past their past pain. a few years later the marriage failed...the author, rob bell, says that God will never run out of more balloons.

...months ago, karien and i went to los angeles, CA...(not such a big fan of LA)...while we were there, we walked around beverly hills. near rodeo dr, we found a balloon. a block later we saw a man holding a few balloons in his hands. he looked crazy or homeless...or both. he stopped us when he saw her balloon, he claimed it was his that he had let go earlier. when karien offered it to him, he awkwardly refused. he said he let it go hoping that it would come back to him. karien said that maybe she was the way that it came back. after some convincing, he reluctantly accepted the balloon, with obvious gratitude.

during our encounter with this man, i couldn't help but think, "how foolish is it to let a balloon go and expect or hope for it to return?" ...strangely, it did come back, although not by the way he had planned.

yesterday, a friend of mine reminded me of the story from Sex.God. and invited me and everyone around to take a balloon...or a few balloons and release them in a similar act of moving forward. as i took my balloons thru the woods to a clearing at the top of a hill, i couldn't help but remember the man from beverly hills...and how much i felt like him. how foolish can a man be release a balloon to the sky and hope that it will return to him?...how foolish am i for this hope?

they rose into the sky, yellow and green against the blue sky. then slowly my balloons dropped from their flight into the limbs of nearby trees...as if to mock me, trapped, out of reach, unable to fly away...unable to return.

"in all things give thanks and praise to God"

it feels as if i can only do this out of obediance to Him, for i do not feel very thankful right now. may my Father not hear my cries as complaining, so that He may still see me as His blameless and pure child.

my prayer today: thank you God for this place i am in and this difficult part of the race you have laid before me, please give me the strength and perseverance to continue running with my eyes fixed on you...may my life be a sweet aroma for you in your chamber. in the precious name of Jesus i pray, amen.

(as posted 6/29/2007)